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Dating men with aspergers

The inefficient processing of emotion can be very draining - as the emotion temporarily takes over it can impede awareness and rational thought.

The emotional warning signs that are meant to protect you from difficult or harmful situations may malfunction, or work with such a delay that they lose effectiveness.

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) Finally, six hours later, after some more 'probing' on my part, he said angrily that there was nothing he could say, and he was angry at himself for letting me down. His obvious regret was more than enough to make me feel better, and I was just sad that both of us had gone through six hours of misery." The indicators that should have told him that the teasing was not OK, worked at such a slow pace, that his own delayed response becomes further feed for the bully, who sees it as a sign of weakness and/or stupidity.Typically, it garners a laugh from the TV or movie audience, too.An excerpt from An Asperger Marriage by Gisela and Christopher Slater-Walker, describes how a combination of social ineptness (not knowing how to appropriately approach the boss about needed time off), and the inability to express emotions in an understandable way created a major problem in their marriage: "CHRIS: Scratch the surface of the professional literature about autism and Asperger syndrome and you will soon find that communication difficulties of one kind or another play a very central role in the diagnosis.Needless to say, therefore, that communication problems may be just about the most trying diffculty in any Asperger marriage. GISELA: For me, one of the most frustrating aspects of our marriage has been the impossibility of discussion of any issue that may be at all emotive.A person with Asperger's may feel raw emotion, but not be able to immediately identify it or its cause.Not only does this cause breakdown in communications in common, everyday situations, it can also be very dangerous.This means that they may be less than prepared to defend themselves verbally (or, in bad situations, physically) in an argument or conflict.When I think of this, I think of the old stereotypes, used often in movies and sit-coms, of a school bully who says something mean to a "geek" type character, who doesn't immediately respond in an appropriate way, but then a moment later says, "Heeey!It has been often said, or implied, that people with Asperger's don't feel emotion.Anyone who's known me through the years can testify that that is absolutely not true.


  1. Just as men and women are different, just as a guy who likes sports and a geek who likes comics are different, aspies and people without Asperger’s.

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