The truth is, our thoughts don't always determine our feelings (how often do we hear this idea! Actually, emotion has to be quicker than thought, because emotions have to do with our survival. Hypnosis is used to rehearse differently around them.Close your eyes and use your imagination to strongly rehearse feeling and acting differently in situations where normally you'd feel insecure.I know this might seem like a contradiction to the above, but it can be valuable to look to the beginnings of that old fear of rejection. Maybe you'd been taught by someone else that rejection is the very worst thing that can happen.
Trying to think differently is a small part of actually changing. Hypnosis can work directly with how people feel when they experience situations and therefore bypass the impracticalities of trying to change someone's thought processes when they are highly emotional.We also fear, perhaps more than anything else, losing approval from others. In tribal times, being ejected from the safety of a group could have meant death. Fear should keep us alert and safe - like the beam from a lighthouse warning ships of submerged dangers.But too much fear, like a super-beam of light blinding the ship's captain, can cause the loss of the very thing we feared losing.If a man discovers a diamond in the earth but, through ignorance or short-sightedness, believes it to be a worthless stone and so casts it aside, does this tell us more about the diamond or the man?Whether someone rejects someone else can tell us so much more about the 'rejecters' than the rejected.You don't learn to jump rope by constantly telling yourself you don't want to fall on your face.Right here and now, take a few minutes and really think about how you want to be in the future around this issue: relaxed, indifferent, self-assured?And this may be especially true when it comes to fear of rejection.Take Kelly; her fear was taking over her life and damaging her relationships."I was always the new kid, trying desperately to be accepted, to fit in!Kelly's terror of rejection also extended beyond her relationship.She was a budding author and had completed six novels, but fear of knockback had, until now, prevented her from ever submitting of her work.