Some studies suggest that gay and straight men have similar age preferences when it comes to partners.
(With one important distinction: More masculine gay guys seem to prefer younger men, and those who identify as more femme desire older partners.) A more recent study by Facebook, however, found that partners in both gay and lesbian couples tend to have much higher age gaps than their heterosexual counterparts.
At the time of the affair, he said, “I would’ve told you that relationship was completely consensual.
I would have said, ‘Yeah, I’m 14, but I’m really smart. And it’s normal that a 25-year-old would want me to be their boyfriend because I’m a grownup.’”Spacey abused his position of power over this man for sexual gratification — just as he did with the actor Anthony Rapp and what seems like countless others.
Even if your relationship is deemed wholly kosher in the eyes of the law, it can be hard to avoid the stereotype that dating someone older automatically means you have “daddy issues” — a view supported by some gay psychologists.
“Simply put, I think we’re angry at [our fathers] for running away from our expressions of love and physical contact,” writes the psychologist Stephen Lugar in .
Not only do you face stereotypes about why you should have been able to fight it off, or how you probably loved it, but you also have to deal with how your own trauma connects to noxious gay-specific myths, like the one about a gay pro-pedophile organization called NAMBLA (or North American Man Boy Love Association) infiltrating everything from Disney programming to Antifa. While the legal age of consent ranges from 16 to 18 across the U. for sex between any gender, in other countries, the law stipulates different rules for same-sex and straight relationships.When you’re a teen, entering into a relationship with an older gay man can be a protective measure.Isolated from peers and family who may not understand their sexuality, gay teens sometimes gravitate toward older men who have traveled the road before them (and who could end up exploiting the vulnerability of their situation). Alex Jung that whenever he would describe his sexual relationship with Spacey to friends, he would include a caveat.“Every time I’ve ever told the story, I am compelled to tell people how seductive I was,” he told the writer.In Chile, for example, the age of consent is 14 for heterosexuals and 18 for gays.And it took until the turn of the century for the U. to equalize ages for same-sex and different-sex partners.But maybe I was seeking it out because it was so isolating being gay in high school and being around people who couldn’t relate to me.”Still, the label of victim doesn’t sit right with him.On the one hand, he doesn’t know if he should have been “fucked with” at such a young age, but he also says he actively pursued the relationship.It feels like it’s okay because you’re a horny teenager yourself.”Studies have shown that when you factor in cases where men are “made to penetrate” someone else, the rate of nonconsensual sexual contact between men and women are basically equal: 1.267 million men said they had been victims of sexual violence, compared with 1.270 million women.But myths surrounding male sexuality make it harder for these men to come forward; some are even pressured into reframing the victimization as a “rite of passage.” Studies also show that as men grow older, they’re more likely to be blamed for their abuse than female victims.