Many people turn to online dating because they simply don’t have the time to date in the traditional sense (i.e.
going on date after date after date to find “the one”).
The personal touch shows you’re genuinely interested, but the brevity and non-committal tone shows you know you’re special, too, so you’re willing to walk away. Remember what you’re up against (now’s a good time to refer back to my “Three Mistakes …” piece to read about some of the behaviors that turn women off to online dating).
It’s not fair to you, but that’s the reality you’re facing.Don’t you both deserve to have your profiles read carefully and thoroughly?After all, if online dating profiles are a part of the whole online dating process, why skip that step?I was excited to see some great conversation happening in the comments of my piece “The Top Three Mistakes Men Make in Online Dating.” Both men and women shared their experiences with online dating and debated over the mistakes and fixes I offered in the piece. How do you reconcile a trillion different preferences in order to offer men advice on what to do to be successful with online dating? All I can do is set some parameters and offer my advice based on my own experiences and hope that it helps at least a few guys out there.Throughout it all, what became most apparent during the discussion is that men didn’t want a “don’t” list. What they really want is some advice on what I hesitated to even write this piece because what people like is far more subjective than what people don’t like. To that end, this is my list “to do’s” for people (yes, people, not just men) who are trying to find a long-term partner using an online dating site:1.Read the profiles of your potential mates carefully: Just as you took a lot of time and energy to write a good profile for yourself, so did a lot of other people.And just like you, those people are trying to communicate to you and the rest of their potential mates what they bring to the relationship table.It’s just like posting an inaccurate photo of yourself; sooner or later people are going to realize that’s not the real you, throwing your chances of a long-term relationship out the window.4.Don’t write a novel: Just as you don’t want to have too sparse of a profile, you also don’t want your profile to be a novel.Respect people’s time by not writing any more than you’d be willing to read yourself.Moderation is the key here; provide enough information to give people a clear snapshot of who you are, but don’t bore them to death War-and-Peace-style.5.